Two big heavy balls

Recently I had been experiencing some joint pain on the finger next to my index. That’s right, my middle finger. It felt like it’s been bruised badly and whenever I rubbed it, hurt like I had slammed it on something concrete. I don’t recall getting it injured nor used it for any other activity that may bring a certain pleasure to my ex girlfriend. Nope, she didn’t ask for me to help her relief an itch on her back by scratching it the past couple of months so that couldn’t be it either.

Maybe during one of my driving excursions I had to express displeasure at a fellow driver’s antics on the road and showed him what I really thought of him at that moment. Maybe he stopped his car, came over and showed me what he thought of my way of expression with my middle finger. Maybe he crushed my middle finger or slammed it shut on his car door repeatedly. Maybe the pain was so excruciating that I blocked that scene out of my memory which would explain why my finger feels like its badly bruised and I don’t have a single recollection of how it happened. Maybe.

Or maybe not, as recently my pinkie finger started displaying similar symptoms. Same type of bruised feeling and honestly, no one uses a pinkie to exhibit your anger at another person. So that really rules out my middle finger escapade too. I think its something less sinister or more pending on how you look at it. It’s a sign that my aging body is starting to get lazy. The blood flow that is. I think the big problem is the issue with the ‘chi’ in me, it is weak. A little like how Anakin Skywalker ended up joining the dark side.

So I was telling my dad about it and he came out of his room with this huge set of balls in a box and passed it to me. It’s the type you see in movies filmed with ancient China as central themes where usually either some evil kung fu master is seen using it or the emperor would rotate them in one hand. Basically it is two balls sized like a super inflated ping pong ball each and made of either metal or cold marble. What you do is you put them on your palm and skillfully and very carefully rotate them around on your palm.

Believe it or not, it works like a miracle. Ten minutes of that rotation of the balls on my palm and the joints actually started to feel less painful! I was skeptical when my dad passed them to me initially but really I figured what more harm could happen except when I drop them on myself. It works! It really works! My two fingers felt a lot better and a lot less painful. The ‘chi’ is strong again.

A word of caution though. If you ever decide to try one of these miracle balls to improve your ‘chi’, you should really avoid dropping them while using it because that may present a different set of problems altogether. They weigh a ton each. Ok that’s just a figure of speech but it feels like a ton. Should you drop one of them on your toes, you may start showing middle fingers to everyone around you on the spot and they may not really take too kindly to your reaction. Then even the balls wouldn’t be of any help to your fingers bruising.

Either that or use them alone in your room. That way you are free to show all hand signs when accidents happen and still not have bruised fingers. You just have to figure out how to unbruise the toes.